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Asma’ was married to az-Zubayr bin al-‘Awwam, a pious and dedicated Muslim. Asma’ knew the responsibilities of a wife towards her husband. She took care of his possessions and managed his horse. She milled the flour and prepared his food. In short, she was an exemplary wife for a pious husband.
When the time came for her to emigrate from Makkah to Madinah, she did not hesitate to leave her birthplace and travel to a new and strange place for the cause of Allah. Even though she was pregnant, she set out on the long and difficult journey to Madinah. Allah decreed that she give birth to a healthy boy right outside of Madinah at a place called Quba’. The child was named ‘Abdullah bin az-Zubayr.
Asma’ was a very intelligent and courageous woman. She was also well known for he generosity. Her son ‘Abdullah once remarked, “I have not seen any two women who were more generous than my aunt ‘A’ishah and my mother Asma’; but their generosity differed. As for ‘A’ishah – she used to gather together whatever she had until, when she had accumulated enough, she would distribute it to the needy. And as for my mother – she would not keep anything for the next day but would distribute it immediately.”
During the battle of Yarmuk, Asma’ bravely participated with her husband and son. She helped the mujahideen in any way that she could – caring for the sick, preparing food , and taking care of other needs of the army.
During the governorship of Sa’eed bin al-‘Aas, many thieves spread in the city. This did not frighten Asma’ in the least, for she purchased a dagger for herself and hid it in her clothes. When she was asked, “What are you doing with this dagger?” she replied, “If any thief comes to me, I will pierce his stomach with it.”
Asma’ was always careful to follow the commandments of Allah to the best of her abilities. She was eager to ask the Prophet (pbuh) questions about her religion, even if they appeared trivial. Once, her mother came to visit her in Madinah. Her mother had been divorced by Abu Bakr in the days of jahiliyyah, and she was still a disbeliever. Asma’ was concerned whether she was allowed to treat her mother nicely and accept her as a guest, so she went to the Prophet (pbuh) to ask him this question. “O Messenger of Allah, my mother has come to me, and she is a disbeliever. May I treat her kindly?” The Prophet (pbuh) replied, “Yes treat your mother kindly.” He also allowed her to provide for her needs.
Asma’ learned the manners and etiquette of Islam and raised her children upon these noble qualities. She once advised them, “O my children, spend in the cause of Allah and do not wait for riches and blessings to arrive, for if you wait for them to arrive, you will never be blessed with them; but if you spend from what you have, you will never have poverty.”